


Unwanted Advice

by oldmenfucker98 (mentalismmaria)



Category: Borderlands
Genre: Cunnilingus, M/M, Trans Character, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-27
Updated: 2015-04-27
Packaged: 2018-03-26 02:02:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3832918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mentalismmaria/pseuds/oldmenfucker98
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack takes an inexperienced Rhys under his wing whether he wants it or not, one night between his best friend's legs</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unwanted Advice

Rhys tried to concentrate on his tongue, licking up between the folds of flesh between his best friend’s legs. He tried to keep up his air of aloof confidence, with some difficulty in his precarious situation. Mostly to deflect the fact that he had never done this sort of thing before. Of course, Vaughn didn’t _have_ to know that, and he seemed pretty content to let Rhys in between his legs in the first place, which felt like a bold decision. Rhys didn’t want to disappoint him. Of course, that didn’t make navigating his genitals any easier. The Cyborg took to timidly lapping at the labia spread before him, looking up at his friend sprawled out on the bed who’s brow was furrowed in an unreadable expression, either arousal or discomfort. Maybe both? Was it okay if he felt both?

All Rhys could really focus on was the strange tangy taste Vaughn had, not unpleasant, but something he was unused to. He was starting to notice just how tired his jaw was before something seemed to crackle in the back of his mind, making feedback ring in his ears and making his echoeye seem to flicker. Jack’s voice, unbidden and grating, filled his head.

“ _Oh my god_. What are you doing…? Just. God, just _stop_ , you’re embarrassing me here.”

Rhys reflexively tilted his head up from Vaughn’s genitals and growled “ _What?_ ” at nobody in particular. Vaughn flinched, confused, and his friend between his legs immediately went red.

“S-sorry. That was Jack.”

Vaughn blinked perplexedly before settling down with a slightly reassured “Oh.”

Jack’s headache-inducing static clouded Rhys’ mind again. “Man, look at you! I’ve never seen anything so pathetic. Almost sad, really. I thought at least you’d be a little _better_ than that.”

“Do… _Do you have a problem with my friend_?” Rhys tried to keep his voice low, but Jack was quickly on his last nerve with that. Crackling, obnoxious laughter drowned out his senses.

“Haha what? No, no, god, _geeze_. I’m talking about your technique buddy, what the hell did you _think_ I was talking about? You act like you’ve never even seen a snatch before, what kind of friend gives his bro head like that?

“Do you uh, do you need a moment?” Vaughn ventured quietly to the deeply blushing, livid man who sat glaring blankly at seemingly nothing in particular. Rhys seemed to snap back into reality.

“Yeah uh. Excuse me.” He got up, awkwardly wiping his mouth before giving his friend an apologetic look as he went into the nearby bathroom.

With the door firmly shut he could now vent his frustration, at least. Jack was already there, in all his eerie, blue glory, his feet not quite touching the ground and his visage casting no reflection to the nearby mirror. A ghost in every sense of word. Rhys was no longer impressed with this peculiar feat of artificial intelligence. “What the _hell_ is your problem?”

“My problem, _Rhys_ , is that you’re acting like you’ve never seen a damn vag before, and frankly, as an unwilling occupant of your head I find that offensive. Especially since I have to _watch it_ and occasionally see how disappointed your little buddy is because you can’t seem to find the clitoris.” Jack tried to lean against the counter, only to find that his hand would only phase right through the marble. He tried to play off his subsequent stumble effortlessly, like a cat that had rolled straight out of its bed.

Rhys squinted at the transparent phantom before him. “Are you… are you _serious_.”

“I’m _dead_ serious, Rhys. This is a _serious problem_.”

Rhys could only groan and bury his flushed face in his hands. Jack seemed to neither notice nor care, brushing his digital hair back and pacing around his cyborg host.

“Okay, so, you don’t just lick it, alright? Use your lips, for pete’s sake. You have a whole mouth there and you’re only using a fraction of your arsenal here.”

“Oh my god.” Rhys grumbled into his sweaty palms. “Jack. _Please_ stop giving me advice. I don’t want to know how you eat pussy.”

“Okay first of all, yes you do, and you’re going to frickin’ _appreciate_ it and you damn well better _thank_ me when you give your best bro the best goddamn orgasm of his young life. Second of all, if you don’t put variation to your licks you aren’t going to get a peep out of foureyes over there—“

“ _Jack!_ ”

“ _What?_ ”

The two Hyperion company men stared each other down for a tense moment; the slightly taller, redder Rhys trying to glare at the hologram while still visibly flustered. His voice broke as he tried to keep it soft. “If I want your advice, I’ll ask for it. Alright? Now I would like to go back to screwing my boyfr- _my friend_ , perfectly fine on my own.”

The ghostly blue AI pouted, rolling his eyes in an annoyed manner. “ _Fine_. Don’t come cryin’ to me if your ‘bro’ wants to finish without you, though.”

The two exchanged another, confrontational glare. Rhys decided to be the bigger man and leave, namely because he was all too aware that he had left Vaughn for far too long. He didn’t wait for any indication that he and Jack were through with this bizarre exchange, he just wanted to leave. He tried to play off his peculiar absence with a fake stretch as he languidly made his way back over to the bed.

“Geeze, sorry about that man, I can’t really uh, control when he comes around, ya know?”

“… Yeah,” Vaughn had settled somewhat on the bed, as though he had resigned himself to the fact that Rhys might be occupied for a while. His lower half was still bare to the world. Rhys gave the crop of dark fuzz of his mons a nervous look.

“So. Uh. You wanna pick up where we left off?”

“I guess? You didn’t seem all that into it. We don’t have to like, do it _that_ way if you don’t want to—“

“No, no, yeah I totally want to do it,“ Rhys awkwardly climbed onto the bed, and right back into place between Vaughn’s legs, laying flat on his stomach. “Let’s do this. I’m ready when you are.”

Vaughn seemed to squirm under him slightly. “You sure?” Rhys blushed anew, heart pounding with nerves and arousal and his earlier encounter with Jack. He have a soft, encouraging kiss to his friend’s muscular inner thigh, then another, continuing as he made his way to the tangle of brown pubes at his crotch.

The alien sensation of static began to creep through his brain again. Jack’s voice was quiet, almost soft in his head. “Hey. Go slow.”

Rhys had more important things to do than listen to Jack, but he still lingered on teasing just around the fuzzy edge of Vaughn’s crotch, lips brushing and kissing against sensitive skin, making the smaller man’s hips buck just slightly in a flinch. “That’s it,” Jack said, approvingly. “Now put your lips against his clit.”

 _Of course_. Of fucking _course_ he’d try to be the backseat driver during sex, of all things. Rhys would have deliberately disobeyed but, well, that was a good idea, and soon his soft lips were slowly exploring the subtle wrinkles on the hood of Vaughn’s clit, stopping just short of the sensitive, swollen organ peeking out just underneath. The muscles of Vaughn’s thighs tensed for a moment, perhaps appreciatively.

“Nice. Suck it a little. Really _appreciate_ it.”

Rhys tried to ignore how he could swear he heard the slightest, appreciative breath from Jack as he wrapped his lips against the swollen clitoris before him. The organ fit nicely in his mouth, though he still felt woefully inexperienced with this particular equipment. He tried to treat it like any other dick, really. His tongue swirled around it, and Vaughn let out a soft puff of air, relaxing into the mattress. Rhys had just really started to get into a particular rhythm before Jack piped up again.

“Okay. Now. Lick a strip all the way up once, just once.” Rhys gave his friend a firm lick from one end of his vulva to the other, stopping with a flick of his clit that made the corners of Vaughn’s lips twitch upwards, half buried in the pillows. “See? See how much better it is when you take your time and appreciate the little guy? Now put some love into those labia there. Dude’s got a nice looking snatch, I’ll give him that much.”

Rhys cringed while his mouth was still on Vaughn. He never wanted to hear Jack say anything like ‘ _labia_ ’ ever again. Not that he ever wanted to in the first place. But he relented, carefully lapping at the oddly-textured folds of skin, gently pushing them apart to reveal tender, pink flesh in the crevices they formed.

“No, no. not like that.” Rhys paused with a soft huff that he hoped Vaughn didn’t notice. “Put your all into it. Come on. Suck ‘em a little. Really get in there. You know what I’m talkin’ about?” _No, not really_ , Rhys thought, in vain. There was no way he could really communicate with Jack other than by trying to follow his instruction. Nonetheless, he took to less measured ministrations to Vaughn’s folds, almost reckless in his movements, using his tongue and lips to gently grasp and tease. Vaughn’s hips lifted, just slightly, pressing himself further against the sensation. Both Rhys and Jack seemed to share the same feeling of satisfaction.

“That. Is what I’m fucking talking about. Now spread him apart a little, I wanna see.”

Rhys momentarily had to stop himself from snapping at Jack right then and there. The idea of Jack, or _anyone_ , for that matter, seeing that much of Vaughn angered him. Though he wasn’t too certain as to why. Still… Jack was ‘helping’. Though he seemed to be having far too much fun giving out this ‘advice’; just from how breathy he started to sound, echoing off the walls in Rhys’ mind with a strange crackle of digital feedback. Rhys used his thumbs to gently spread Vaughn’s lips open, revealing a red and lurid entrance that both took Rhys aback in its visceral appearance and aroused him in its primal symbolism. His dick ached against the mattress. Jack let out a pleased hum that vibrated in Rhys’ skull like Velcro being pulled apart.

“ _Nice_. Put your fingers in all that. Start with one.”

Rhys attempted to slip his flesh index finger into Vaughn dry at first, but a disapproving grunt from Jack made him hurriedly stick it in his mouth. The sufficiently slicked up digit slipped in easily, and Rhys swallowed hard at just how _wet_ Vaughn was, so warm and soft inside. Rhys did an exploratory press against various points around his inner walls, and watched his friend gently smile at the sensation. Jack also seemed to approve. If Rhys could see him, he would have ventured a guess that the hologram would be leering. Possibly drooling, as well.

“Good! Good good good. Put another finger in, and curl them up.”

Vaughn stretched slightly around the added width of Rhys’ middle finger, but he seemed appreciative of it. The fingers curled up inside him, and hooked against a crease in the internal walls. Rhys wasn’t entirely sure what he was rubbing, but it seemed to make Vaughn squirm in a good way. The muscles at the entrance of his vagina twitched obscenely around Rhys, and it made the cyborg’s mouth water. He wasn’t waiting for further instruction from Jack; he _needed_ this man, and he showed it with his mouth as he dove back down to lap at the erect length of his clit. As he began to suck with gusto, the faintest crackle of Jack’s presence seemed like an echo in his preoccupied mind. He could just barely hear the words “ _Holy fuck_.”

Rhys would have agreed there, and it probably would be the only time they had ever truly agreed on something. Vaughn jumped and fidgeted where he lay; inner walls pulsing against the fingers rubbing on the sensitive place hidden inside him, a hot mouth enveloping his clit. His hips bucked against Rhys’ jaw, but he didn’t seem to mind. He was only focused on get him off now. Vaughn’s well-defined legs shook, cold sweat running down them in rivulets as he forced them to stay open and not crush his best friend’s head. It was becoming a difficult task, and as he climbed the peak of his orgasm, he took to holding the backs of his knees to keep them steady. The internal muscles of his friend clamped hard around Rhys’ fingers, and Vaughn ground his mons against the cyborg’s mouth as he rode out his orgasm with a low groan.

Rhys didn’t withdraw his fingers until his friend stopped pulsing around them. They came out damp and slightly wrinkled, but Rhys found himself subconsciously putting them in his mouth nonetheless. As unused as he was to it, he could come to appreciate his friend’s taste.

Vaughn lay boneless and overheated, panting though the look on his face was nothing short of satisfied. “Shit, dude,” His voice cracked in a breathless laugh, “Not bad for a first timer. I can’t wait to see what you’ll be like with some practice.”

Rhys blushed as he sat up, but his hard-on bobbed at attention at the idea of ‘practice’. He waited for Jack to slip in with his own coy remark, but the artificial specter seemed to have finally fallen silent for now. Probably satisfied having given out his ‘advice.’ _Good_. Vaughn sat up a little, giving his friend’s barely-hidden erection a coy smirk.

“You want me to do somethin’ about that?”

-

Later that night, Rhys sluggishly toddled over to the bathroom once more for a post-sex piss, sweaty and exhausted but ultimately satisfied. He was so caught up in the afterglow he barely registered, nor cared that Jack decided to appear right then.

“See? _See_? You _needed_ that advice, would you have gotten the best lay of your life with that amateur technique of yours?”

Rhys was a little more concerned with making sure his pee stream hit the toilet bowl. “Okay, yeah, you got me.”

“I got you _laid_ , that’s what I did.”

“I was already in the process of getting laid there, but, yeah I guess you’re… nnnot wrong.”

“We make a pretty good team, actually.” Jack paced around Rhys again, hopefully not to get a better look at his dick. “Next time you should let me in a little, really let me show you what a pro can do here.”

Rhys stopped urinating long enough to look the hologram straight in the eye. “No. _Absolutley not_. You’re not ‘helping’ me with anything like that anymore.”

Jack didn’t even flinch at that. He just smiled, coyly. The eerie flicker of his visage distorted his masked face for a split second.

“Really? Because if you ask me, I don’t think you’ll be able to pull that off again without my help. Get it, princess?”

Jack’s pixilated form flickered out of existence, and the static cleared from Rhys’ mind with barely a chuckle from the strange, digital phantom. Rhys was left to mull over the events between Vaughn’s thighs momentarily. His blood ran cold as he understood what Jack had meant.

**Author's Note:**

> I NEVER WANT TO HEAR DAMEON CLARKE'S VOICE IN MY HEAD SAYING THE WORD 'LABIA' EVER. AGAIN.


End file.
